By Jenni Saake © 2011
When I was a little girl I was in a musical. One of the catchy tunes
included the words, “Self-control is just controlling yourself. It's
listening to your heart and doing what is smart. Self-control is the
very best way to go, so I think that I'll control myself.”
Cute song, but I'm afraid the definition of “listening to my heart”
doesn't always lead me in the best direction. In fact, Jeremiah 17:9
tells me, “The heart is hopelessly dark and deceitful, a puzzle that no
one can figure out” (The Message). When I'm listening to my heart, I'm
prone to be swayed by my own selfishness. Selfish motives rarely lead to
smart decisions!
It may sound funny, but when I think of self-control, I think of
television commercials for bladder incontinence products such as
Depends. Why? Because when the Bible talks about self-control, the
original Greek word used actually means “continence,” or the ability to
control one's own bodily functions and discharges, especially in the
context of sexual urges. With that picture in mind, it's easy to see
that I can't depend on my own heart to always lead me down the right
path, otherwise there would be no urges in need of control.
The tricky part about self-control is that little word, “self.” What if I
replace “self” with “God,” so that rather than listening to my heart,
I'm intentionally seeking God's best for me in any given situation? If
I'm asking God to be in the driver's seat, I can fully depend on Him to
help me make smarter choices in life.
A lifestyle of asking God's direction in every circumstance can be
described as “dying to self.” I know, dying doesn't sound like an
attractive invitation at all, does it? What does this dying-to-self kind
of self-control (God-control) even look like? How does it work?
The good news is that God never asks for any form of death without
offering His abundant life as greater replacement value. What may seem
like painful sacrifice, like saying no to the offer of physical love
when someone temps me to look for sexual gratification outside God's
guidelines of marriage, yields rewards like peace and self-respect, far
greater than the momentary thrill I'm turning away.
“So here's what I want you to do, God helping you: Take your everyday,
ordinary life - your sleeping, eating, going-to-work, and walking-around
life - and place it before God as an offering. Embracing what God does
for you is the best thing you can do for him. Don't become so
well-adjusted to your culture that you fit into it without even
thinking. Instead, fix your attention on God. You'll be changed from the
inside out. Readily recognize what he wants from you, and quickly
respond to it. Unlike the culture around you, always dragging you down
to its level of immaturity, God brings the best out of you, develops
well-formed maturity in you” (Romans 12:1-2, The Message).
While listening to my heart may lead to nothing but heartache, God
doesn't leave me guessing about His best for me. I can trust that His
plan is the most dependable one around. If I could sit down with the
little girl I was 30 years ago and teach her a new song, I think it
might go something like this. “Self-control cannot just depend on
myself. It's listening to God's heart to find out what is smart.
God-control is the very best way to go, so each day I choose to die to
self.”
